George Baletsa of Newbury died suddenly, unexpectedly, on June 24th.  He was 45 years old and has a wife and three children who now start each day without him.  My sister-in-law, his neighbor, is grieving, for she knows the value of a good soul.  She tells me that George was unfailingly kind to her and to her son, who played often at his house with his boys, and she misses him.

Every day someone dies and someone who loves them grieves forever.  There are freak accidents, cruel attacks, devastating medical diagnoses.  The older we get, the more it happens.

Facebook (FB) has been around for a while now, and its users have aged too.  An International Business Times’ study showed that FB users between the ages of 13-24 are leaving or canceling their accounts, while there is an increase in the 30-something and  40-something demographics.  The over-55 age group shows the biggest increase of all.   FB is indeed getting older.

I think the “new” FB users are sharing more nuanced, more personal information than earlier users.  Yes, FB will remain a place to see pictures of your cousins’ children and grandchildren, your friend’s vacation photos, a hilarious YouTube clip.  But increasingly it is becoming a place to document progression of cancer treatments, to mark anniversaries of loss, and to reflect upon the death of someone we love.   How hard it must be to access a social networking site after a loss like that of the Baletsa family.  And yet, FB could be a powerful source of connection and comfort, if there was a way to break out of its current superficial construct.

The “like” option is not enough, my sister-in-law and I decided.  It just feels weird to “like” a painful or soul-bearing statement.   I said, “What FB needs is….” and we declared simultaneously:  an “I hear you” option!

Someone who loved George Baletsa could post: “George died a month ago tomorrow; it is so hard to believe.”

And she could know that she was heard and that she is not alone, with a simple “I hear you” ping.   Words, often, cannot take away the pain, but the simple knowledge that someone bears witness can soothe.

FB:  are you listening?